Whenever I get too busy I always end up thinking of the word Selah. It is used 74 times in the bible with the majority of it being used in psalms. I was taught that Selah means break, or rest, or pause. I think God puts this in my mind to remind me to rest, break and pause.
In my life I don't have much. At least I think I have it pretty easy compared to the rest of the population. The population that has kids, that struggle to make ends meet, that work full time and come home and continue to work full time. Those that are trying to meet deadlines, and complete project, or complete homework. I have a job that I truly enjoy and love. I am good at my job and nobody can deny that I have a way with children and something magical can happen.
Because of this thought process I usually end up doing to much. I end up not taking breaks. I think to myself I can do this, if they can do it with all that they have then I can do it. My week is filled with going to work and constantly being on, my brain works over time to address specific issues with this kids, to write IEPs, to make deadlines, to fill out paperwork and to manage and address concerns from staff and parents. Then I come home and I make dinner, or I have more work to do, or I have church, and I actually just signed up for softball. There are days when its 8:00 and I think to myself where did my day go. Even though I enjoy doing all these things I am naturally an introvert. My perfect day is work, come home, make dinner and paint. My perfect weekend is to just paint, go on a bike ride and breath. Do I want weekends like this every week of course not because as a servant of God I desire to be in relationship with others. I desire to see my sister, brother-in-law and nephews, I desire to go out and watch movies, I have a desire to catch up with friends. Sometimes though I forget about finding the balance and find myself drained. When I am drained that's when I become overly sensitive about things. That's when I can start breaking down. That's when I take things too seriously and that's when I really am just tired. But I am constantly telling myself other people can do this. Other people are always helping others, or others are coming home and working with their own children. But then again they are not me and I am not them.
So how can we find balance?
I am reminded by my heavenly father everyday that everyone is unique and everyone's path is different. I am reminded that I am no good to anyone if I am too tired or just giving 50%. I am reminded by my husband to relax. I am reminded by my sister that she is grateful for any help I can give but to not over extend. I am reminded by my family, communication is important and to be honest. I am reminded by all my friends to just take it easy.
I am blessed to have a husband who will help me. Who understands me. I am blessed to have friends that understand we all have lives but that doesn't mean our relationships should suffer. Some weekends I need to remember to say no, I need some time. Some days I need to shut off my computer and brain and go home on time. For my own mental health I need to remember to spend time with myself and my father in heaven.
I am reminded to have Selah. Selah. Break, pause, rest.
Monday, April 27, 2015
Thursday, April 2, 2015
World Autism Awareness Day
Today, April 2nd, is World Autism Awareness Day. People are encouraged to wear blue as a symbol of supporting Autism Awareness. For me Autism celebration day is every day. I am not just aware of what impacts Autism can have on families I breath it everyday. I have been working and teaching children with Autism for almost 10 years now. I grew up with a relative with Autism. I saw the changes he went through and I had a good relationship with him. I love his brother and his parents in a way I don't think they could every know. I am drawn to these kids. God placed a gift of reaching these kids in my heart. I have made life long friends with families I have worked with and I know that Christ places me in specific situations for his glory.
I think of how blessed I am to be teaching these kids, I praise God everyday. I think about FAME and what an impact it may be and how the inspiration for FAME has and always will be because of my relative. I think about how to be a better teacher to these kids everyday.
As a teacher I build them up to becoming better versions of themselves, pushing them academically, socially, emotionally and behaviorally. Because I know they can reach potentials that are untapped. I infused art, music, creative writing, dancing, joking, and laughing in all areas of my classroom. I teach to their age and am not ignorant of kids growing up. In the past I've seen classrooms where everything is not to the age, immature. Kids aren't forced to speak up, or to request correctly, kids a coddled and not taught to be flexible. Depending on their age kids must be taught accordingly. If a kid is 18, the expectation should be texting on a phone, having a conversations with others, riding a bus and reporting back to parents they got to their job or got to college. The sky is the limit!
Everyday at work I celebrate these kids. I serve them. I teach them. I mold them into being a better version of themselves. This should not be confused with "fixing" them. I do not fix these kids because I don't believe there is anything to fix. I've worked along side people who want to fix things, fix stimulatory behaviors, fix sensory, fix their entire being. I don't believe in fixing these kids. There is nothing to fix. God made them a certain way just like he made all of us a certain way. They all have their own personalities. They all have their uniqueness. They all have a beauty in them about the world. Why should I squash what makes them wonderful. I have been around so many different kids and they are all different and remarkable in their own way. I celebrate who they are and push them to their limits. We must meet them at who they are and mold them into being better versions of themselves. We must meet them at their personalities and get to know each and everyone of them. We don't need to "normalize" these kids because what is normal really? Who is normal? And who set the standard for "normal." I know I am not normal and to be honest I don't want to be. I don't want to be another faceless person in society. We are all so wonderful and we all have differences that make us wonderful. Same goes with kids and people with Autism. They are all so wonderful. I love my kids. They make me laugh. They make me want to be better. They make me excited about my job everyday. To watch them progress into amazing people while still holding on to who they are. Beautiful
Meet them where they are or else you might just miss out on getting to know some remarkable people!
I think of how blessed I am to be teaching these kids, I praise God everyday. I think about FAME and what an impact it may be and how the inspiration for FAME has and always will be because of my relative. I think about how to be a better teacher to these kids everyday.
As a teacher I build them up to becoming better versions of themselves, pushing them academically, socially, emotionally and behaviorally. Because I know they can reach potentials that are untapped. I infused art, music, creative writing, dancing, joking, and laughing in all areas of my classroom. I teach to their age and am not ignorant of kids growing up. In the past I've seen classrooms where everything is not to the age, immature. Kids aren't forced to speak up, or to request correctly, kids a coddled and not taught to be flexible. Depending on their age kids must be taught accordingly. If a kid is 18, the expectation should be texting on a phone, having a conversations with others, riding a bus and reporting back to parents they got to their job or got to college. The sky is the limit!
Everyday at work I celebrate these kids. I serve them. I teach them. I mold them into being a better version of themselves. This should not be confused with "fixing" them. I do not fix these kids because I don't believe there is anything to fix. I've worked along side people who want to fix things, fix stimulatory behaviors, fix sensory, fix their entire being. I don't believe in fixing these kids. There is nothing to fix. God made them a certain way just like he made all of us a certain way. They all have their own personalities. They all have their uniqueness. They all have a beauty in them about the world. Why should I squash what makes them wonderful. I have been around so many different kids and they are all different and remarkable in their own way. I celebrate who they are and push them to their limits. We must meet them at who they are and mold them into being better versions of themselves. We must meet them at their personalities and get to know each and everyone of them. We don't need to "normalize" these kids because what is normal really? Who is normal? And who set the standard for "normal." I know I am not normal and to be honest I don't want to be. I don't want to be another faceless person in society. We are all so wonderful and we all have differences that make us wonderful. Same goes with kids and people with Autism. They are all so wonderful. I love my kids. They make me laugh. They make me want to be better. They make me excited about my job everyday. To watch them progress into amazing people while still holding on to who they are. Beautiful
Meet them where they are or else you might just miss out on getting to know some remarkable people!
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